Embrace procrastination

The twenty-fifth newsletter is about the back of my mind

Trigger warning: this piece contains 30+ instances of the word ‘procrastination’.

Procrastination is widely considered to be a bad thing. A total waste of time. Unproductive.

But that’s a misunderstanding.

Procrastination is an essential part of the creative process. It is necessary, beneficial, and powerful.

It all depends on our relationship with our inner procrastinator.

Like many creative people, I’ve been known to do a lot of complaining about procrastination. About how I distract myself for hours to suddenly snap out of it and frantically work to make up for lost time.

And yes, being sucked into a waste-of-time rabbit hole sucks. But blaming our internal procrastinator is not the way to deal with that. There’s more than a silver lining to procrastination and we shouldn’t throw out the baby with the bathwater.

The back of my mind

I write, in the first place, to clarify my thinking.

The process starts way earlier than the moment I sit down at my desk. When I have an inkling of an idea, I first have multiple conversations about that idea. And I walk around with it in the back of my mind. Percolating, marinating.

All of this unconscious time is absolutely necessary. And procrastination is a sign of a creative mind that is working on something in the background. 

It’s because the writing process is creative, that I procrastinate. When I want to start writing about something, but in the back of my mind I’m still processing, the best thing I can do is be aware of it and accept it.

Forcing it will only lead to more procrastination. And even if I start writing, it will not get me the thing I want. Clarification.

Meet my IP

I write this newsletter every week. And every week, there are moments when I encounter my inner procrastinator (IP for short). My attitude towards my IP is crucial, and determines if the process is going to be a struggle or not.

It’s a matter of choosing curiosity over avoidance.

For years I was used to avoiding my IP, thinking he was trying to sabotage me. But when I got curious about what my IP has to tell me, I uncovered things that help my process instead of hurting it.

My IP gives me valuable information. He shows me what I’m fired up about and where to reduce the scope. He points me to what is important. It takes guts to do meaningful creative work, and procrastination is a sign that I’m on the right track.

Earlier this week, I found myself being very procrastinative (which apparently is a word). At that stage, I still thought that I was going to write about an entirely different topic. When I started actively avoiding my laptop, I knew there was something going on. 

When I got curious and started asking questions (instead of berating my IP), I figured out that the topic wasn’t ready for the writing stage at all. I hadn’t given it enough unconscious time yet.

I’ve become better at listening to my IP and when I ask him (male, my age, kind of a smart-ass): ‘What’s going on? Why aren’t we writing?’, a couple of themes emerge:

• Fear. There’s some unprocessed fear about publishing. ’I’m not good enough’, ‘nobody wants to read my crap’, ‘I’ve written about this before’ etc.

• ‘Why’. My reasons for writing need to be reinvigorated. It has been too long since I’ve actively remembered my ‘why’ for writing (to clarify my thinking, to help people become better listeners, and to find like minded folks).

• Decisions. There’s a lingering, unanswered question. A decision hasn't been made yet. Maybe I’m still mixing up two different topics, maybe I’m not clear on why this matters to me, or maybe I haven’t had enough conversations about it.

This week it was the last one. I had not made the decision what to write about. I thought I did, but I discovered I actually did not. I had talked myself into writing about a subject that I wasn’t ready for yet. I had a story and an observation that I thought I could combine, but they ended up not being compatible.

My IP cleared that up for me. Procrastination is a powerful indicator that there’s a (creative) decision I have yet to make. And these days, I knock on his door to figure out which one.

What I needed was the confidence and clarity to leave my former topic and put it back on the shelf for further fermentation, and accept that I needed to find something else for this week.

Something I was more familiar with. Or someone.

IP to the rescue.